Humor – Hotline

Hello, and Welcome to the Mental Health Hotline:

Click Here to Listen to the Audio Version

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn’t matter which number you press – no one will answer.

If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on line.

If you have amnesia press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number and your mother’s maiden name.

If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.

If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.

Humor- Obsessions

A Parenting Class

A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children. “You all have obsessions,” he observed.

To the first mother he said, “You are obsessed with eating. You even named your daughter Candy.”

He turned to the second mom. “Your obsession is money. Again, it manifests itself in your child’s name, Penny.”

He turned to the third mom. “Your obsession is alcohol and your child’s name is Brandy.”

At this point, the fourth mother got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, “‘Come on, Dick, this guy has no idea what he’s talking about. Let’s go pick up Peter and Willy from school and go get dinner.”

Humor – Symptoms of Wellness

THE 12 WARNING SIGNS OF GOOD HEALTH*

(If several or more appear, you may rarely need to visit a doctor.)
1. Regular flare-ups of a supportive network of friends and family.
2. Chronic positive expectations.
3. Repeated episodes of gratitude and generosity.
4. Increased appetite for physical activity.
5. Marked tendency to identify and express feelings.
6. Compulsion to contribute to society.
7. Lingering sensitivity to the feelings of others.
8. Habitual behavior related to seeking new challenges.
9. Craving for peak experiences.
10. Tendency to adapt to changing conditions.
11. Feelings of spiritual involvement.
12. Persistent sense of humor.

*Adapted from a posting on a computer bulletin board in Waldport, Oregon, author unidentified.
Reprinted in Whole Earth Review (Winter 1994), a compendium of brash thinking and lofty ideas.

Past Events

This gallery contains 48 photos.

Past events from our newsletter: deprescribing psychatiatry, hidden gens, and mental health advocacy as well as ICOSS, mad pride, human Rights and social justice, storytelling hour, isps open dialogue, and olmstead then & now, US healthcare, the flying dhild, and Peer pathways. Continue reading →

Creative Approaches to Voices, Visions, and Other Sensory Phenomena (WEBINAR) 1/25/2024

Upcoming Webinar 1/25/24 | Creative Approaches to Voices, Visions, and Other Sensory Phenomena

Creative Approaches to Voices, Visions, and Other Sensory Phenomena, with Tami Gatta, Creative Arts Therapist and co-founder of the Hearing Voices Network NYC.

Date: Thursday, January 25th, 2024
Time: 12-1:30pm (Eastern) 9am to 10:30 Pacific

Webinar Description 

When words do not suffice, how do people find ways to express? Learn more about strategies incorporating the use of art, drama and movement that allow individuals to both externalize and concretize unique experiences. Techniques are focused on expanding modes of communication, decreasing isolation, and exploring the potential for role play, role expansion, and humor.

Hearing Voices Course – Spring 2024

And if this isn’t exciting enough, stay tuned for ISPS-US’s Spring Workshop Series announcement, featuring Tami as one of six expert presenters exploring various psychological frameworks for working with Voice Hearing. The course will be capped at 40 participants.

About the Presenter:

Tami Gatta, MA, LCAT, RDT

Tami Michelle Gatta is a graduate of NYU’s Steinhardt School, where she earned her MA in Drama Therapy. A Licensed Creative Arts Therapist, she has chosen to further her trauma studies in both the US and abroad. In 2013, Tami became the first American to complete a 3-month externship with Ron Coleman and Karen Taylor in respite care and alternatives to hospitalization for individuals navigating voices, visions and other experiences deemed “psychosis.” In 2015, Tami began speaking more openly about her own trauma history and mental health struggles, ultimately becoming a Certified Peer Specialist. In 2016, she graduated from the Institute for Arts in Psychotherapy, where she went on to become Co-Director. In 2017, Tami was presented with the World Hearing Voices Congress Award for “Outstanding Contribution to the Growth and Development of the International Hearing Voices Movement.” Tami is the founder of Tami Gatta Mental Health Counseling, PLLC pending, where she provides individual psychotherapy and trauma-informed supervision to peers, students, clinicians and supervisors. She is also the co-founder of Curious Rebels, LLC, a CE granting, training and consulting firm, which offers professional support series on mental health and staff retention, the incorporation of peer specialists into the workforce, trauma-informed care, vicarious resilience, as well as a 3-year post-graduate program geared towards using improvisation and embodiment as a means of healing. Tami is a co-founder of Hearing Voices Network NYC, where she is a primary trainer in the Hearing Voices Movement. Tami is committed to ongoing personal growth, and emphasizes queer-empowering, anti-racist, fat liberation work that addresses historic and present inequities in mental health treatment.

Register on Eventbrite

LACCC presents: Innovations in Recovery Conference, Monday, June 23rd, 8am – 4pm

The LOS ANGELES COUNTY CLIENT COALITION is putting on the 3rd Annual Innovations in Recovery Conference. The conference will ill take place on Monday, June 23, 2014 at the California Endowment Center (Directions & Innovations Conf 2014.flyer)  located at 1000 N. Alameda Street Los Angeles, CA 90012, from 8:00am to 4:00 pm. 

Please join us!!! The Wildflowers’ Movement will be exhibiting and presenting SHINE ON YOU CRAZY DIAMOND, an innovative workshop with music, singing and art! Our group is about giving & receiving mindful support while practicing self-awareness, cultivating radical wellness, and celebrating diversity. We meet every 1st and 3rd Sunday at SHARE! in Culver City and out at various events, and in nature, our natural habitat.

 

 

Found Voices: Art Exhibit, Poetry, Music

Join us where ART and SCIENCE collide with Art, Poetry & Music at the California NanoSystems Institute, UCLA Art/ Sci + Lab, Gallery, at UCLA CNSI, this coming Tuesday, May 20th, at 6.30-9.00 p.m.

The CNSI UCLA Art | Sci Center + Lab is dedicated to pursuing and promoting the evolving “Third Culture” by facilitating the infinite potential of collaborations between (media) arts and (bio/nano) sciences.

 The center’s affiliation with the California NanoSystems Institute (CNSI) offers access to cutting edge researchers and their laboratories and a dedicated gallery for exhibitions. The California NanoSystems Institute (CNSI) is a research center at UCLA whose mission is to encourage university collaboration with industry and to enable the rapid commercialization of discoveries in nanosystems. CNSI members who are on the faculty at UCLA represent a multi-disciplinary team of some of the world’s preeminent scientists. The work conducted at the CNSI represents world-class expertise in four targeted areas of nanosystems-related research including Energy, Environment, Health-Medicine, and Information Technology.

                                                                                                                                                            CNSI NEW DIRECTIONS  are attached… Parking is $12, $5 w “disability” pass. There is meter parking on La Conte Ave. and parking at Ralphs on La Conte – if you decide to shop and/or risk it 🙂